Annual Geoff Award happened and for the first time, we were all winners. This is because a Elden Ring The boy in the suit waddled onto the stage, edging through every World Premiere (speaking in a World Premiere voice) and cementing his place when next was Geoff’s throne.
Pot boy was there to deliver the news on the new Elden Ring story trailer, which is good news in itself. You can see it below.
Someone else helped cut out the pot boy’s look. Things to keep in mind: Geoff introduces the pot boy as “the old man’s friend” and says he “should wear a bow or something”. Why are you lucky? Sorry, but when you’re in the company of a royal, you need to deal with them properly and sensibly. Does a deep arc fail? Some smart shoes?! Air Jordans won’t cut it, man.
You can detect the reluctance from the pot boy. At 43 seconds, you see Geoff forcefully pry the letter from the pot boy’s hand. Moments later, the pot boy lowered his arm angrily and turned toward the audience as if to say, “One day, I’ll stop him.” For a second, I think he’ll slow down and try to elbow Geoff’s shin.
Can I just say that pot boy looks good too? His designs are super detailed, with battle scars fully displayed and a nice waxy top that flows down the sides. Good lank on the arms, with iconic skinny legs driven by a regal style. His creator should be proud. That makes me wonder what it’s like to be the one who made this pot boy. Imagine being able to hug him, or pat his cold back. Is he empty? Would a slap on his stomach make a loud noise? The Pot boy maker must also know what happens when you open his wax seal. I bet he holds loads of socks, like the giant two-for-one baskets at the entrance to each and every Live Sports across the UK. Either way, that’s what a true king would offer his friends.
Actually, come to think of it, a bow isn’t really a greeting. That’s not how you should greet a pot in the game of Souls. Traditionally, one should always roll on them, and thus break them into pieces. Really, Geoff should follow suit and put his microphone on the ground and do a forward roll on the noodle boy. Or like, at least one of the forward scrolls that you make at a slight angle if you can’t fully commit to the roll. Obviously not with the intention of disrupting the cooking boy, but just to acknowledge his presence in a way that is appropriate for the game.
And what about that? story intro Open? Not a single pot in sight, but still a great piece of cinematography. Familiar mysterious slices with little meaning, narrated by a pale doll with four arms, two heads, and a rather cold-looking bonnet. Thing is, this could be one of those at least confusing from the Software trailer I’ve been watching for a while. Often they are more ambiguous, as opposed to this, at least giving a theme of a story.
Next year, I imagine a new story unfolds with Elden Ring, and the noodle boy becomes the new host of The Game Awards. He will swallow Geoff whole and he wears a bow tie to dress the man who sent him. Bring in 2022.
