Ukraine war: ‘No family now’ – the eldest son of a mother of nine fighting on the same front, her husband died on the road | World News
Maryna Berlizova was sitting on her low bed, a picture of her youngest daughter taped to a dresser and a stroller in the corner, overflowing with baby clothes.
She was absently stroking her belly and looking out the window of her mother-in-law’s small three-bedroom house, which she now shares with her children.
In a few weeks, a mother of 9 will become a mother of 10; Her young daughter will be born into a large family but without a father – her husband, Yurii, was killed near Kharkiv on 24 February, the first day of the Russian invasion, the day “everyday” upside down thing”.
“My husband is a soldier,” she said.
“In our spare time, we always go to the riverside for a barbecue, everywhere with the kids – to the zoo, everywhere.
“We spent all our time as a family, you know, we lived well. Nothing. No family now.”
Her grief was immediate and uncontrollable; She sobbed between the words and often stared at a photograph of her husband in military uniform, as if seeking his comfort and support.
“He is a good man, he is a kind, responsible man.
“He is a sports coach in the brigade, they go to the competition.
“He loves to sing and play the guitar.
“And just like that, life is over. We had our own plans and now I’m alone.
“We are proud [of him]But it doesn’t make it any easier for us.
“Who needs this war? How many children have died? Families are simply destroyed, just ruined.”
She just found out her husband is dead. They heard nothing from him for 77 days as the Russian invasion progressed, claiming more and more lives.
“Of course we’re proud. They protected the others and didn’t let Kharkiv’s vertical post pass, they just defended it alone.
“He didn’t even have time to get us out of the city. He said, ‘I’ll take you out, then I’ll go fight’.”
“He said in our last conversation: ‘I’ll be back when the war’s over’. We’re still waiting …”
By terrible coincidence, her eldest son is now fighting on the same front lines where her husband died.
“He’s 20 years old, still clueless, still a kid,” she said.
“I was so scared for him, I was so scared.
“I tried to get him out of the army because of this situation, to help us stay at home, but it didn’t work.
“War. Can not.
“And now he doesn’t have a cellular connection. But you have to live with it. I can’t even call him to see how he’s doing.
“How can this be? It’s hard. You just live and believe it’ll be over soon.”
The bedroom door was securely closed, the children were playing elsewhere. Grief is done in private.
“Everyone is afraid to cry so as not to upset others. That’s why we don’t cry. We cry alone, but we all don’t cry together. You can’t cry. Of course it’s hard.”
I asked her about the Russians, the soldiers who killed her husband.
“This is not a person. This is not a person at all,” she said.
“They came to our land to destroy our plans for the future, destroy families.
“I don’t know what they came here for and how many more people have to die to end this war.
“Three months without sleep, three months without sleep is also difficult.
“You’re worried about the kids.
“Where do we go next if they suddenly come here? How long are we going to run? Where do we go next?”
Read more:
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‘My baby is gone… but he died a hero and I’m proud of him for that’
The types of weapons being used by the Ukrainians against Russian forces – and the weapons they are asking for
It’s a terrifying dilemma that so many families here face.
Yurii is buried nearby, resting peacefully in the village he grew up in, in a peaceful corner of the Ukrainian countryside.
“You’ll find his grave, you’ll know who he is,” Maryna told us as we said our goodbyes.
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She is right. In a small cemetery opposite the village church we found it.
Filled with flowers and with a picture of him posing proudly in military uniform is the final resting place of Sergeant Major Yurii Berlizov: soldier, husband, father; one of the first to die in this terrible war, one of the first thousand.
