Oh, my poor Neon. I tried very, very hard to keep it clean. But, I’m a non-Muslim college student living with my parents, so I spent a lot of time on it. In the end… the rust it got from my dubious habits grew exponentially over time. Spilled food, spilled drinks… spilled other things, and no amount of Meguiar can remove those stains. 14 years ago, I went to a girl’s birthday party that I liked. Then some of us were going back to her mother’s house (she lived at home) and I offered to help get some party supplies and leftovers in Neon. That’s why a crock pot full of meatballs ends up spilling over into the passenger’s legroom. For the rest of the life of that car, every time it was hot in my car, it would smell like Sweet Baby Ray’s BBQ sauce. The girl feels really bad about it, like it’s her fault. She’s been my wife for almost 8 years, so I guess it’s fine now.
I have occasionally left my car unacceptably filled with garbage. Again, I practically lived out of it. Everything will be lost. Sometimes there are creatures. Once, a rat got into my car and made a nest. Another time, a cat slipped through a fallen window, got into a bag of Taco Bells, and then pooped all over the inside. Also, sometimes I’ll give my grandma a ride, and then I’ll find the highly experimental drug she put in her pocket, because you know who carries some Oxygen around all the time. Are not? Drugs and the elderly.
By far, however, the worst mess was caused by my hobby of fishing. Ideally, you take something like an old Ford Ranger with you on your trips to the lake, but, well, you run what you bring. So I’ll throw the tackle bars and boxes in the backseat of Neon and go. Fishing can be rude, especially if you keep them. Once, a container full of nightcrawlers (large earthworms) opened and they escaped, only to burrow under the rug and die. That was bad enough, but much worse was the chicken liver container I left in the backseat after a catfish fishing trip (this is catfish and catfish fishing, not the other) ). The container was sealed, but was left under a coat for almost a week…in July…in a car with no air conditioning. The following weekend, I offered to bring buckets of soft drinks to a church event venue. I was throwing 24 packets of Coke in the back seat when I heard a “pop”. Blue frozen chicken blood spray Neon’s back. Smell, oh my god odor. It’s like Lucifer’s own diarrhea has been unleashed in my car. I’ve tried everything I can think of – industrial cleaners, air fresheners, even considered finding the back seat of another Neon light (thank God I have a seat cover). later that I can throw away). it lost month to bring the smell to an acceptable level. I am afraid of rainy days to have to pull up the window.
These days, I just have the Caravan and all the weird stuff my kids do in it. I live like a pig in it too – I just spilled ranch dipping sauce on the center console trying to eat and run a few days ago. But at least I covered the middle seats and left a rubber mat in the rear cargo area. I was able to take care of it mostly. There was an incident a few months ago where an iced coffee left a mess. I thought I’d cleaned it up clean enough, but after a few days I could smell coffee and sour cream. I borrowed an ozone machine on a colleague’s recommendation, and you know what? Those things are creating magic.
