Editor’s note: Late summer can be an exciting time, but it can also be… exhausting. With a combination of regular social plans and back-to-school preparation for many, there tends to be a lot going on. For anyone feeling overwhelmed, we hope the reminders in this post, originally published October 2020, help make your day a little brighter.
Sometimes the simplest advice is the hardest to follow. I’m sure you’ve heard the phrase “parenting yourself” before, and although the concept makes sense at first, learn how to be a parent often a journey of a lifetime. To make it a little easier for myself, I often think about what my mother would say, along with the other nurturing characters in my life — therapist, parents-in-law, girlfriend, teacher and my mentor.
I asked our team to share some of the best advice they gathered from their mothers or from other wise people in their lives (or advice they give to their children). The purpose is to synthesize a small piece of their worldly wisdom to share with you today. And if you haven’t remembered to call your mom (or any comforting person in your life) to thank them lately, Remember gratitude will make your serotonin go up when you feel blue.
And now, helpful reminders when you’re having a bad day. These are the simple but extremely important things that we tend to overlook or forget when we are running on drums.
01
Drink some water (or take a shower)
When was the last time you drank water? When was the last time you showered? Drinking water or being near/in water are great ways to help you reset your body. When you’re overwhelmed, showering can sometimes feel like the last thing you should do, but it helps bring you back to your center.
02
Make sure you’re eating
When was the last time you ate? What you’ve eaten There’s never a wrong time to make healthy decisions when it comes to food. Ask yourself what foods make you feel energized, strong, and focused, and follow those instincts. Greasy foods always have a time and place, and often not a time when we need to pay more attention to our bodies and minds.
03
Get a sleep
It’s time to be really clear with yourself about bedtime routine That will help you get the best night’s sleep possible. What rituals can you start before bed to help you rest easier? Go to bed earlier, put away your phone — do the things you know will help you sleep more.
04
Repeat a spell
I’m sure mantra for different stages of life. One for when I’m worried (my anxiety is worse than my fear)one for when I’m sick (I trust my body and what it needs to do to heal)one for when i grieve (Grief is part of the human experience)and once I’m faced with tough decisions (no right or wrong, only forward).
Repeating these mantras will help my head get back to logic and reason, and not let my thoughts run away from me. What are the mantras that work for your life?
05
Cry
It’s okay to cry.
Check in with yourself, and if you’re feeling physically overwhelmed or need emotional release, shed a tear if you can. If you’re using SSRI, it can sometimes be harder to find this release, so when it does, EMBRACE IT. I cry a lot less now so when I do, I make sure to give myself the time and space to really speak up. And wow, does it feel good!
06
Acceptance practice
Peace is in the moment without judgment. Worrying about what has happened or what lies ahead is not the way to fix what you are feeling. Focus on what you are doing right now and try to do it without judgment. Check in with yourself and ask, “Am I okay?” and try to accept it if the answer is no. (I understand this can’t happen in all cases, but when it is, it can be a useful perspective to take.)
07
Change your scene
It can sometimes be tiring to stay in one place for too long. Ask yourself if you need a change of scenery to help regulate your mental state better. If you do, something as simple as moving to a different room, workspace, or neighborhood park can help you reset and start fresh.
08
Call a friend
If social interaction seems appealing to you, a simple phone call to a friend or family member (or getting a hug from someone, if that’s an option for you) can help. can help you get out of any vortex you’re feeling right now.
09
Spend time alone
Sometimes you need social interaction (see above). In other cases, interacting with others can feel exhausting. When that happens, if you can, take some time for yourself to do a favorite activity, think a little or do nothing.
ten
Turn off your phone
The new iOS system has widgets that let you check how much time you spend on your device — something I found therefore helpful in checking my phone usage. If you feel exhausted by technology, put your phone in another room and focus on, quite literally, whatever other.
11
Take a few deep breaths
When we feel stressed, one of the first things to do is take deep, intentional breaths. Pay attention to your breathing during times of stress. You may notice that sometimes you’re holding your breath or taking short, shallow breaths without even realizing it. Next time you feel nervous, try practicing belly breathing—You might be surprised at how different it is.
We’ll never completely eliminate bad days, but we can find ways to improve them when they happen. These are worse days for all of us.
Kate is currently learning to play the ukulele, leaving her husband, children and dogs desperate. Follow her on Instagram at @witanddelight_.
