During the past four years, therapist and I used our last session of the year in December to recap some of the big wins and establish intent and priorities for the coming year. The list of solutions is not too much because it is committed mantra. I consider the ways I want feel so that when I make a decision, I understand very well why behind them. Last night was our last class of the year, and I beamed at the priorities I’ve set and the mantras we’ve created to keep me focused on the road ahead. I’m always inspired to listen to what others are doing, so in the spirit of sharing, here are some priorities I’ve set that can help you discover how to prioritize your life.
Featured image of Riley Reed
I first
A moment of celebration because this is a huge victory for me in 2021. For the first time in a while, I regained my calendar and energy, and put myself at the top of this year’s list. I’ve been so ready to serve everyone from work to dinner and going out that I often feel frustrated, tired, and always behind. Now, I feel in control of my schedule and most importantly, my mental and physical health.
Here’s what that looks like: identify the times you need to take a break. When I travel, I block my calendar two days before and two days later to rest and catch up on work and family essentials. If I’m giving a big presentation or moderating a board, I block my schedule a whole week in advance to rest, get physically active, and fully prepare. Listen, athletes have no problem determining what needs to be done to perform at their best, and that’s how I approach my accomplishments at work, friendships, etc.
I’m continuing this because it keeps me fully present with my friends, family, and work.
More honest and difficult conversations
I grew up a foodie, someone afraid of feeling too big, “rocking the boat,” or making others feel uncomfortable. Therapy has brought me closer to difficult conversations more often. Over the past year, I’ve enjoyed and 100% of those conversations were worthwhile, and I always save time by being direct and honest. What they say is true, the more surnames you have, the easier it is, and for me it is imperative that I really live in harmony and make my relationships flourish and grow. If I can impart any advice from my experience: come up with scenarios and just chat. And remember, you’re not responsible for other people’s feelings, so please don’t go on that. Yes, be kind to your honesty and take responsibility for your part, but other people’s feelings are not your problem.
Move
Feels like this always comes first, but my approach is different. I know my body and myself so well that when I move it, I feel 100% better. In the past, being active meant breaking a sweat, commuting hard, and even on my days off, I still did my best. All the things that I can’t maintain. What I want and prioritize is 30 minutes of exercise a day. Whether it’s a light walk, taking the stairs versus the elevator a few times, walking to the store, swimming, biking, yoga, stretching, or doing something that sweats, the idea is I simply doing something. Not for the sake of losing weight, but for living an active and comfortable life.
Consumption for the Planet
In an effort to be kinder to the planet and not contribute to waste, I’m reorienting the way I receive gifts from my brands and consumption. A look in me wardrobe and I’ve been a bit off from what I really need, wear, and get. There’s no shortage of clothing rental companies from Rent the Runway to Nuuly, not to mention my sister’s closet. Have you ever noticed that having more things takes more time? More time cleaning, inventorying or if you’re like me, more time searching for stuff? I’ve put a lot of effort into using the kitchen, storage and water bottles and this is next on my list.
Energy boundary
The older I get, the more I understand the variety of things (and people) that give me energy and what drives me down. It is very similar to the lines in my first tip, “Me, first”, which is: I am not able to do or do around Everyone (please, anyway) it sucks my energy, the energy of the room, or is part of a project that doesn’t light up me. Our energy is limited, and we need to conserve it for those who deserve it. Not sure what to say to someone who wants your time and you don’t want to give it? Simply reply: “I’m not available, thanks for thinking of me.” We don’t owe anyone an explanation we don’t want to give. I mentioned to my therapist that I was doing this, and I was ruthless with my schedule, and she helped me reframe it to I’m not cruel, I’m very mindful and purposeful with where and how I want to spend my time. I hope that rule helps you too.
New year, new part-time position?
I really shouldn’t put a question mark there because that’s what I strongly believe will happen. You know what they say, watch what you put into space because it’s going to happen. So here I am putting it out there and excited about where it leads. My big plan is to live outside of Austin for the summer (June 1 – September 1) and move back to California and/or Colorado to be closer to the ocean and mountains. The flexibility of working remotely combined with my disdain for Texas summers and my love of the coast and mountains is making a big deal out of me, and I’m working hard to make this a reality. If you’re reading this and think you can help with rent, accommodation, etc., I’m listening.
After my therapist and I identified our priorities, she said, “How would you like to feel in December 2022 during the last session of the year?” My answer?
I want to feel nourished and fulfilled through the way I have spent my time and the way I care for myself, my friends, my family, my community, and the environment.
I think these priorities will help me get there. Which is yours?
