When we lose our beloved pet (whoever we love), the house we live in is no longer the same. We are not the same people. Our world has changed, and we are no longer who we were before we died. Coping with the loss of a pet It’s a deep struggle at any time, but dealing with the loss of a pet during the holidays to all causes related to our lost love is a heartbreak.
There are no dogs running in frantic circles around the house. No decorations hit the cat and play with colored ribbons.
The Christmas tree, the candles, the lighted windows and the shared meals were no longer what they were before her death. And so we are isolated in our loss. Exile. While it’s nearly impossible to do anything that requires us to respond to the whirlpool of energy around us, there are ways to help you — or a loved one — begin to heal after the loss of a pet. and continue the grieving process over the loss of a pet.
So, how can we be present to those we love, in the spirit of this special season?
We shouldn’t try. First, we have the right not to attend any celebration we don’t want to, although that’s not always the most helpful thing when trying to work through the pain of losing your pet.
We need some light and laughter. But trying to fit in with the celebration, reversing the mind and body’s natural response to the pain of losing a pet never works. It is counterproductive. Emotions and tears can ambush you.
Tips for dealing with the pain of losing a pet
Now is the time to try to accept that the old normal is gone. And there’s no timetable for dealing with the pain of losing a pet. We are living in a new normal, with a new relationship with our beloved animal companion. And amid the laughter, cheers and celebrations of the season, there is no need to explain or justify our feelings. It will probably feel empty. However, even in this uncertain time, the grief of losing a pet needs to become grieving, becoming positive so it can begin to heal.
Steps for grieving the loss of a pet
Here are some thoughts that I hope will help ease your lost pet’s grief over Christmas:
- Light a candle in front of a photo of your lost dog. Talk to him in the quiet of your own space, to let each other know how much you miss each other.
- Write your feelings down. Write down your feelings and help make sense of what is happening to you.
- Cry as long and deep as you need. But remember to take breaks. Join your friends and family if just for a hug here. A song there. A smile. Then you can return to the privacy of your emotions.
- Please go out. Take a walk. Being outside and walking helps release stress and being in nature will ease the pain.
- Think about spending a few hours volunteering at an animal shelter or an upscale home. Your loss has opened your heart. Seniors, who have lost so much, will love your company. Be sure to listen carefully to their stories. You will probably hear your own echoes.
- Honor your pet’s memory by talking to abandoned animals in your local shelter and bring some special holiday to the staff.
- At the end of the season, if there is a Christmas tree, plant it outside, covering the tree with peanut butter for the birds and squirrels.
- Take care of yourself. The pain of losing a pet drains us physically and mentally. Stay hydrated, for example.
Finally, remember that the pain of losing a pet is not a mental health issue. You didn’t do anything wrong! And there is no pill for sadness. But contact a grief and loss counselor if your sadness overwhelms you and you’re frightened by the intensity of your emotions.
Lost pet gifts – what is acceptable?
While the holidays are often about giving gifts, the urge to give a pet empathetic gift to a bereaved pet parent should be done with caution. Most people who have lost a pet want to make personal “memory” choices, choices that reflect the special relationship we share with our pets.
Final words on dealing with the loss of a pet
Stay connected with friends and family, but only those who truly understand your deep pain. Avoid people who say things like, “That’s just a dog.” In time, you will hope for a future of love and acceptance.
Poet John O’Donohue tells us that one day we will be able to enter the heart of our soul, where our loved one has been waiting for our return all this time.
